How Can I Explain?

Before me stands a woman.
You.

How can I begin to tell you what I think and feel?

You have no idea of what you are.
No inkling of the power in you.

All you see when you look at your­self is
inse­cu­rity,
vul­ner­a­bil­ity,
too many rag­ing emotions.

You don’t know what to make of me,
and, frankly, nei­ther do I.

I alter­nate between extremes;
one moment I am hot,
the other I am cold.

One moment I am gen­tle,
rev­er­ently twirling your hair in my fin­gers;
the other I use you and take you
and leave you in agony from my abuse.

How can I tell you that when I look at you
I see the fem­i­nine divine in your eyes?

I see a force of nature behind the shy smile on your lips;
and I know that you feel any­thing but pow­er­ful
and yet I mar­vel at your strength.

I feel your aura envelop me in radi­ant fem­i­nine light
and I see it open­ing up like petals on a flower
to admit my pierc­ing, pun­ish­ing mas­cu­line power.

I feel your soul and body wrap­ping itself around me,
giv­ing me a place to rest, to recuperate.

How can I explain to you how I want to con­trol you,
to force you to open your­self up even fur­ther to me,
to be even more recep­tive of my wor­ship of Woman?

I want to pos­sess you.
I want to use you.
I want to extract tears of joy and agony from you.

I want to make you scream in pain-​​filled plea­sure
and some­times from plea­sure alone
and other times from pain alone.

I want you to feel.
Oh, God, I want you to feel.
I want to drink your emo­tions
and bathe in your tears.

How can I explain to you how I feel?

How can I explain that I want to rest my head
on your breasts and suckle from you,
to have you pet my hair and nur­ture me?

How can I explain that I want to reach with my hand
into the very core of your body and wrap myself
in you like a warm, soft blanket?

How can I explain that I want to spill
the very essence of me into you
and have you keep me safe?

How can I explain that I want to feel
your suf­fer­ing flesh rip­ple with anguish
as I take my plea­sure from you?

How can I explain the awe I feel
when I look at you?

How can I explain the raw fem­i­nine power
I feel radi­at­ing from you and how
small that makes me feel?

How can I explain my need to con­trol you
utterly and com­pletely,
to bask in your grace and gen­tle­ness,
to take you.

To use you.

How can I explain?

I don’t know.

But one day, I will make you under­stand
what I see when I look at you.

One day, look­ing in the mir­ror,
you will feel the awe I feel.

One day, you will real­ize
how strong you are,
how pow­er­ful you are,
how beau­ti­ful you are.

And that day you will under­stand
my need to pos­sess you,
to sac­ri­fice your body on the altar of my desire,
to dive into your soul
and never emerge.